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| (Borden HS J.V. Coach 1998-99 season) |
One day...one day, I will be an assistant coach again. I was an assistant coach before I became a head coach and I have had head coaches telling me there is no way they could be an assistant again. I say...I can't wait. To be able to coach and not have to deal with kids attitudes, parents, buying travel suites, shoes, rumors of what your kids are doing, people bad mouthing me in front of my children....sure, it will be real tough not to deal with (pure sarcasm there). I don't know when that day will happen, but it will some day. It will be some day when I am worn out from the daily struggles and can be the guy who listens instead of who has to make decisions and then stands by them.
I know when I was an assistant, I wasn't always the best one. I had a goal to be a head coach and being young and stupid, I felt like what I wanted to do was better than anybody I worked for...I mean, they all had an accumulation of about 100 years of coaching and probably 600 wins, but I often thought I knew better (not very bright was I). However, there was one thing, I felt I did even being young, dumb, and inexperienced was that I didn't bad mouth my head coach to people in the community or to the players. There were times I was completely against what was being done or said, and I would vent to other assistants or to my wife, or mentors, but never to people that a spark would create an inferno. And as mentors do, they often told me to get with the program or get out. Of course, that was useless help because it wasn't what I wanted to hear.
You sometimes are put into a tough position as an assistant coach because you are a leader too, but you are still not in charge. You want to take the reins, yet you can't, you have all the right answers to each decision (It is way different actually making decisions, advising is waaaaay easier I have found). You have two choices, learn and support that which you don't always believe in or....resign. I guess the head coach could fire you, but if it comes to that point it must be a hugely toxic situation and won't end pretty for anybody involved. Of course, I am talking about my own experiences especially at a smaller school and maybe you have seen this, been this, or dealt with this.
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| (NW HS 9th grade coach 1995-1997 |
But some day...some day, I will be an assistant again. And it will probably be when I do not want to be the head coach, so I will be the best kind of assistant. The kind that supports the head coach completely (I will get to pick where I assist), the kind that listens to complaints but will ultimately support the head coach (not defending and just listening gives the idea you might agree), the kind who will work hard for the head coach but leave the headaches at the gym (even if there are headaches, I will be a good listener, but ultimately it won't rest on my shoulders), and the kind who will want the head coach and program to be successful with zero acknowledgement that I had anything to do with it.
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| (As a head coach at HHS less hair everywhere) |
I think as a head coach having assistant coaches is one of the harder things to deal with and not in a personality conflict way, but how to use them in practice and games. I have tried and tried to involve them, but often feel that they are independent and should be able to "see" what needs to be done. I don't do a good enough job communicating with them, I think. I have tried to be better, but know that I fail often. I struggle with getting input during the season and then going away from what I want to do. I have found that when I start to feel that it isn't comfortable to me, I have to go back to what I believe in...my fundamentals. I have had great assistants who fit all the criteria I have posted above, and only hope they know how much I appreciate them.
