relationships

relationships

Thursday, October 30, 2014

Worst Possible Answer

(Theoretical person gets caught doing something wrong) "I'm not the only one!" or better yet "It isn't as bad as what they are doing!"

When caught doing something you shouldn't be doing, it is only natural that we would get defensive. It is natural that we would try to minimize the effect of what we are doing wrong comparative to others. It would be like a husband caught cheating on his wife and then saying, yea, but my buddy does it all the time. It does not minimize what you have done at that moment to that person.

Accept responsibility, apologize, do whatever it takes to move forward and then work on not doing it again. I am not talking about affairs or gambling, or anything, but about everything.

And trust me, I can be the worst in trying to justify my every action, but I'm trying.

Tuesday, October 28, 2014

The Selfie World

(that's me in my great grandfather's lap, I look younger then)
We live in a new era, the Selfie era. Such a new word and era that when typing in this blog, it is underlined meaning that I have misspelled it, maybe I have, I could care less.

I have tried to take selfies, I really don't like them. I am not attractive enough to take pictures of myself all the time, but I have tried it a couple of times. The point is that there are so many people taking pictures and videos of themselves (vine) that there is little notice of changes as we change, or age, just trying to be nice.

When I look in the mirror, I still see, relatively, the same guy each day. Sure I am balding, ok bald, what hair I have is grayish, ok gray, and I have gained a little weight around the middle of my body. But I don't see those changes looking in the mirror every day, however, when I see a new picture of myself, I often don't recognize the dude in that pic.

I am not into selfies, so I don't see the "new" me that often but when I do, I wonder how my father sneaked into my pic and if I really look like that guy, how does my wife even look at me. Fat, bald, and gray looking more 65 than 45, at least in my eyes.

Aging isn't really that bad for me, until I see myself in a picture. Then I wonder how in the world I became an old man over night.

Monday, October 27, 2014

Coaching Your Own Children

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I have watched others coach my own children for a few years and they have had very good coaches, but I know that I have something that I can add to their teams. So I have decided to coach as much as I can.

Recently, their 5 week basketball leagues finished and I was coaching four games a day. Thankfully, I have help with my son's team as Borden's Doc Nash helped as his two sons were on the team also, and I enjoyed doing it.

Could I have done a better job by having practice?  Probably, but I didn't and we were able to compete. Brandon's team wasn't as good, but Maddie's team won all but one game and they won their tournament.

It isn't about being in charge, it is about passing more of my values and beliefs onto my children by coaching them. Some will agree and some won't, but it is what I have chosen to do and I enjoyed it, though coaching my son was a little more challenging than my daughter.

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Thursday, October 23, 2014

As You Age


I wonder how much longer I can do what I do when it comes to coaching. I am a little too involved physically and each year it seems to be less and less because I just cannot do it. From running to playing, to just being lively at practice and games; to running our elementary programs, I never fully realize how bad of shape I am in until we start again.

Just doing simple drills in short bursts leaves me winded. And then two days later, my legs and shoulders hurt and I wonder why. Why? Because I don't do enough physical activity anymore and that ends up being my exercise.

I know I should exercise more. I know I should run, walk, treadmill, something, but my motivation to do so is much less than my knowledge to do it. I am pre-hypertensive when it comes to blood pressure and I know that exercise would help, but I just can't motivate myself and it's sad.

I think I am handling aging fairly well, I am only 45, but mentally as I get older I want to be comfortable. And being comfortable is only really good in small increments. Too much comfort makes us weak.

Monday, October 20, 2014

Mr. Worst Case Scenario


I have been called Mr. Worst Case Scenario a few times in my life. When some issue comes up or is in the news, I think of every possible scenario where it can happen to me. The one time that I downplayed the odds of something happening to me, it did happen which would only reinforce my previous behavior. Call it a personality flaw, my wife laughs at me and rolls her eyes, but it has kept me "safe".  But it has been something I have had to overcome to venture out from that "safety".

I do think it is a benefit in coaching any sport. I think of every possible worst case scenario and try to prevent them from happening. I guess that is why I never relax in a game or "win" until it is physically impossible to lose. Up 10 with 5 seconds left, game over. Up 10 with a minute left, or :45, or :30 left and I am still coaching as if anything can happen and possibly would.

I would rather keep my starters or best players in too long and then sub out when it's over than to have to put them back in the game again. That's why when I usually do sub, I sub everyone out but the best one or two players to make sure there is ball handling, passing, and scoring still in the game.

It might not be right, and I may have ticked off a coach or two in the past, but I am not doing it to rub anything in. I am doing what I think I have to do to guarantee a victory, even up to the last few seconds because I believe that you and your team can do crazy things to beat me. I've seen crazy things happen before and some to me, I don't want them to happen again.