relationships

relationships
29 years coaching experience/ 7 years as a varsity boys' basketball coach, now assisting

Wednesday, January 29, 2014

Check Out This Article by Perry Noble

 
 Men, if you feel like this when getting dressed though you have a wife, children, a job, a mortgage, and other grown up responsibilities...it is time to grow up.

 
 

Show Me How to do the Impossible...


Monday, January 20, 2014

Stream FREE to Any Large Group





Yea....Umm....Ok



I am not going to lie, when I saw this last night live, I laughed and figured Twitter would blow up.  It did.  But there have been many comments made over this post game interview.

IU assistant men's basketball coach tweeted to the effect that when you put a microphone in the face of an angry competitor who just made the game saving play, you just might get something different than you thought was coming.  Hence, look at Erin Andrews' response.  It caught her off guard a little.  As a coach, there were many times that after a game, win or lose, if a camera had been put in my face, I would have said something crazy.  In fact, some would say I did that anyway.

But, you've got to do better.  You've got to try.  He is representing more than just himself, he is representing the Seahawks organization and Stanford University where he attended.  He is representing so many people, you've got to do better.

With that said...back off the guy.  He was excited, apparently some guys on the other team had talked "trash" before the game, and he was celebrating in the fact that he won, that his team won.  Besides, it was quite entertaining.

Tuesday, January 14, 2014

Mental Toughness

More than likely, your mind will quit before your body will. 


As humans, we do not like to be out of our comfort zone especially physically.  We complain, give dirty looks, whine, or just quit because we may get pushed out of our comfort zone.

The more you are pushed out of your comfort zone, the tougher you will be, and in fact, will create a comfort zone in the midst of adversity.

Friday, January 10, 2014

Before and After the "Dream"

(Sit down! Coach Hunter)
Before I was a head coach, I wanted to be one.  I had all these great ideas about how I, Perry Hunter, would run a varsity basketball team.  I had great ideas and would implement them as soon as I had a team.  But, I was afraid to offer such ideas to the head coaches because then I would be held accountable especially if he tried them during a game.  Often, I just kept those ideas in my head, rarely offering advice, and wondering why the head coach wouldn't do what I would, even though I wouldn't offer up help.

Then I became a head coach, and I realized that you cannot do that job by yourself.  I needed help, often from people who thought like I used to think, but it was appreciated.  I got more comfortable with behing held accountable (Wins and Losses) for what I did as a coach.  You have to make so many decisions, often quickly that every one could cause the game to turn and go bad...or good.

Now, I am in the post head coach assisting time.  I have no desire, right now, to be a head coach again.  Probably never will, but I don't know.  I didn't think I would resign when I did when I finally got my "dream" job.  But now I find myself with the same thoughts about how I would do things.  And I do offer advice.  I just feel extremely uncomfortable in offering too much because I am not in charge.  And I know that sometimes as a head coach, I got a little over loaded with "help", sometimes I just wanted people to be quiet.  I am still in the process of learning when to speak up, when to stay silent and more importantly HOW I offer advice.  "What I always did"....can come off wrong and should be avoided as much as possible.  It's the coaching equivalent to "Well, when I used to play".  Often the opening words can shut down the listener because, really, who cares.

I have had a couple of conversations with my head coach, and one thing I want him to feel comfortable with is 1. I do not want his job, I have his back. and 2. I want him to feel free to tell me to be quiet as I will not take it personally....ever.  Even if he snaps at me during a game (it hasn't happened, but I might have done it a time or two, so it's possible), I want to him to know that I understand.  There is lots of pressure coaching high school basketball in Indiana and all I want to do is help.  That's where everything comes from, me wanting to help.

My coach has made it clear many times that isn't something that I need to worry about, but I do.  I do because I've been in his shoes, and I don't want to be a hinderance, but a soothing help, whatever that means.

Wednesday, January 8, 2014

Geez

We have enough problems that we don't cause for ourselves, so we need to do a better job of controlling those we can.  It's hard sometimes and our actions sometimes go too far and wish we could take back what we did or said.  However, the "I got to get you back" factor allows for things to continue sometimes when they shouldn't.

We have all heard of coaches who have done things outside the confines of coaching that has gotten them into trouble, we have even heard of those who within the confines of coaching has gotten them in trouble.  But at some point, both sides need to move on, at least, publicly.  The pain or hurt inflicted upon you can be bad, but quit perpetrating the issue online.

I posted something and it is true recently for myself.  You cannot pull the pin on a hand grenade and then get mad when it blows up in your face.  No matter how right or wrong you are, if you post something that even seems close to insinuating something from a painful past event, it will be found and it will blow up.  Hopefully for only a short time.  But you cannot be surprised of the blow up, you can only learn from it and not do it again.  Unless you feel the need to defend yourself against such accusations which will, in the end, cause another blow up.

I started this blog for a way to vent on things that were going on in my life, my coaching life.  It probably kept some events going on, but it did end many because once the total truth came out, it often stopped the problem.  Threatening one side with the "truth" does nothing because the "truth" is often perspective especially in emotional issues, and what you might think to be honorable actions in actuality would hurt your argument of the truth.  Make sense?  Probably not.

The best thing you can do when attacked, whether wrongly or rightly, most often wrongly is to allow it to die.  Eventually, eventually both sides can move on, but it was much easier in the time before social media....for sure.