Day 33:
This is to my kids and to my wife. I love you. Sure, everyone else reading this can take it directed to you because I try to love you, too...but sometimes you make it so hard. But even my children, not my wife, she's easy to love every day, I am the one who makes it harder on her, but my children; what can I say.
I have different things I say about my kids that usually draws laughs and one of them is "kids, you gotta love 'em...no, you really do, it's the law or something", and though I say it as a joke, I feel it inside. Sometimes you really do have to force yourself to "love" your children. I always love them, but sometimes I really do not like some of the things they do and I have to force myself to be kind in the middle of my anger.
Yes, sometimes love has to be tough. Hugging and kissing and giving them everything they want is probably just as abusive as a stern word or a spank on the behind, but man I want to most of the time. I love them so much. I tell my students that I love them too, but not the same as my kids. For my students if I saw a car coming and they were in the road, I would yell "hey, there's a car coming, get out of the way!", but with my kiddos, I would run and push them out of the way taking the risk of a full on hit.
I love them so much that I get depressed when I think of them growing up and leaving, and I get depressed when I think back when they were babies and needed me more. Because as they grow, they need me less, at least in their eyes, but I will always be here for them (for you Maddie and Brandon). Yes, Maddie, someday when I have been around your house bugging you because you are married and moved on and have your own family, you will utter those words you did when you were 5 years old when I told you that I would never abandon you; "Dad, enough, time for you to go home". Because you and your brother are my greatest accomplishment, my greatest joy and my greatest loves.
By the way, my wife is awesome. No, when I say awesome, I mean better than your wife. If you do not believe me, ask any of my coaching buddies who know her. I mean, she's let me go to Europe (twice) and Asia to work basketball camps by myself staying home with the kids. Yea, I win.
Challenge: Tell your significant other, especially your children that you love them. And do it every single day even when you don't feel like it. You just never know when it might be the last time you see them.
