What Youth Sports Should Be vs. What Youth Sports Are

 What they should be....fun and the kids learn a sport and enjoy doing it.
What they are....cutthroat competitive.

What they should be...a place for a young person to get exercise and to learn life skills.
What they are...a place for parents to live wrongly through their children.

What they should be...something that adds to a young person's life.
What they are...an all encompassing event that controls a life over academics and other social issues.

What they should be...a place to be a kid creating memories for the adult years.
What they are...a place that burns out kids before they get to high school.

What they should be...volunteers who are coaching for the "love of the game".
What they are...travel sports where coaches are paid and receive other benefits.

What they should be...something no child should stress over.
What they are...too stressful for a child.

What they should be...somewhere for parents and grandparents can enjoy their child running and jumping.
What they are...where parents and grandparents become enraged if junior doesn't play their position or is taken out of a game, or....

What they should be...cheaply priced.
What they are...too costly.

What they should...scheduled for early week nights and Saturday afternoons.
What they are...schedule every night of the week and both days of the weekend.

What they should be...pictures and balls and mementos in a scrapbook.
What they are...too many games to remember that one special one.

What they should be...where parents thank the volunteer coach for the time and efforts put in.
What they are...parents question the coaches knowledge and time put in.

What they should be...where parents tell their children they love them after the game no matter the outcome.
What they are...parents micromanage and over criticize their child's performance.

I am sure there are many more examples here and I could go into more detail, but if sports were not our lives and our children even hesitated a small bit, I am not sure it's something I would want them to be around. Yet, no matter what they should be or what they are, youth sports do prepare our children for life. The inevitability of the cruelty of life is coming, too son and our kids need to be able to fight it off.

When Did Everything Become a Team Sport?

Recently, there have been secretly recorded videos of Planned Parenthood that have hit the media outlets. What is included in some of those videos is outrageous at least and horrific at most. How anyone can defend what they see in those videos is really quite disconcerting. And yet that's happening. The videos were manipulated, this isn't true, etc.

You've seen the pro-choice movement and the supporters of Planned Parenthood defend, deflect, and defend. Why can they not still be pro-choice and pro Planned Parenthood and say "this is not good, we need to take a look at this"?

But isn't just in this one situation, it occurs across the political spectrum and by almost everyone. If there is a basketball coach, it doesn't matter what he or she does; one side will support blindly and the other will critique even in the most positive events that take place.

When did everything become a team sport? Has it always been this way or have we never thought for ourselves and blindly followed along? Maybe so...but as I age the frustration grows.

Yet...I cannot control it so why do I let it bother me so much? I really, really, really contemplate dropping out of society sometimes.  I really do.

Yet Another New School Year

It is amazing how much I enjoy the beginning of a new school year and yet can somehow enjoy when they end. Most regular people have jobs that they work year round, but spoiled teachers get bored a couple of weeks into a new school year (me included).

We've gone to a balanced calendar which is 2 weeks off every 9 week grading period and 7 weeks off in the summer. I don't know if it helps or not, but it has created a shorter summer and with snow make up days, longer school year by amount of days.

But I really enjoy the beginning of a new school year. Sure, I will get worn out with it soon, but I still get to be around the future every year.

And I find that really cool.

When did we....?

What a long summer and after much reflection, when did we....?

When did we become a nation of the overly offended? When did we become a nation of overly offended about issues that are minuscule compared to other larger issues? We get offended more by a flag (I am not African-American, but I understand why it is offensive to them) than fathers that do not take care of their families? Or that the abortion rate is so high in the black community? Or that assault rifles and drugs are rampant yet not made in the black communities? Or that maybe the group that keeps telling them they're for them are actually racist, at the least accidentally?

When did we as white people become racist no matter how informed we become? No matter how much we try to understand and overcome it? When did white people get to tell me that I'm racist no matter what and yet, somehow, they are not?

When did throwing out words like racist, sexist, and bigot get thrown around so much that they are losing their meaning? When we hear those words, we don't often think of people in that way. So when you call a good person who may make an uninformed comment racist, maybe they're just wrong and need to be informed. To compare them members of the Klan or the Nazi party is wrong.

When did animals become equal to or by some, more important than human lives? We get angry over hunting, but not by the thousands of black people who die each day in this country by other African Americans, or the thousands of "babies" that are killed by Planned Parenthood (you can't exclaim "another boy" without acknowledging the humanity of the "clump of cells", nor do clumps of cells have livers, skulls, legs, etc). We seem to forget that there are many children who are hungry in this country because of the decisions of their parents. Why aren't we doing more?

Drugs. My oh my oh my. Why do children look at adults and think we "don't get it" when talking about drugs and no matter how many examples of former students I have that are arrested, they will be different. Ok, this has always been this way...no change here, but I'm ranting here!!!

To be fair, many of those who are so adamantly against abortion, have not made it so easy to adopt children. They don't always seem to do the best for those children after they are born. They also seem to be the group that "supports the troops" as the go off to war, but forget about them when they get back. Why in the world does a private group like Wounded Warriors have to help wounded soldiers? Should not the group of people that send them off to battle not be responsible for "fixing" them when they get back and not just physically but also mentally?

I know this is about coaching basketball in Indiana, but this is also my blog. It is where I can vent and let go of some of the things that I see and drive me crazy.

We, in the US, are so out of touch with the rest of the world that we lose our minds over having to sit in a car rider line at the local school yet ignore those that are homeless and less fortunate on the way to that same school. I find it difficult to explain to my children as they grow up that we can't help everyone. That we can't help anyone, so they have, along with my wife, remind me to do something rather than continuing with my selfish ways.

The "Loser Look"

I've probably written about this before, but it's something that I see often. Well, I see it when something is on the line when it comes to athletics. The "loser look" is that look you see in an athlete's face when they are scared. They are scared at a time when the game or a championship is in doubt. If you've been around sports long enough, when you see it, you'll know it.

You will hear parents or fans say things like "Why's he playing so scared?", "What's wrong with her?" or even profane comments. It's disappointing to see especially if it is your own child, but it is what they do with that look or after that look occurs that matters.

Do they quit? Do they let it pile on top of them to the point that they cannot do anything? Or do they compete through it? Do they move on to the next play even though the last one went to wrong?

I think it's important to remember that when competing especially for a championship that there will be adversity. When you accept that adversity is coming, when it happens you can handle it better. No game, none has ever gone smoothly. Sure some seem like they did, but even in a no-hitter, or a 22-1 win in baseball, someone struck out, someone made an error, someone ran the bases wrong; something has gone astray.

If you ever find a kid that doesn't have the loser look, what you have is a natural born winner. They are the player that says "come on boys, let's go do this", they're the one who everyone (even coaches) thrive off of. They don't come around naturally that often.

But I think they can be created. I think if you have a competitive child they do not have to be a leader, but they can be a competitive winner. And being a competitive winner is performing under pressure. So how do you create this in your child?

1. Talk to them after a game in which you see the "look", in them or someone else.
2. Tell them that no matter how nervous they are (I believe nerves are good because it shows you care and want to compete), they can play hard.
3. Next play. The quicker they can move on from a bad play, forget it, and move on, the tougher they will be.
4. If something isn't clicking, don't let that shut your entire game down. Find some way to contribute!
5. If all else fails for this game or this championship, sit on the bench and be the best cheerleader you can be!

It's creating and developing mental toughness.

Competing is fun, winning is fun. losing isn't fun and playing scared will take all of the fun out of athletics.

Sports often builds character, but it can expose it. It can expose that your character is good or bad.

I love sports, I believe that they prepare you so much for what life will throw at you. If you have the loser look, it can be disappointing, but you can get rid of it, and you can compete and win despite it.

Face Masks for Baseball Pitchers

I've recently had a discussion with an anonymous person on what I believed was a relatively educated group on a message board. It's isn't your regular type message board, you have to pay to be a part of it.

I opened the discussion with the idea that the National Federation should pass a rule that high school baseball pitchers should be forced to wear masks, just as softball pitchers do. I am not sure what the rule for softball pitchers is, but it is more readily acceptable for girls to wear them than for boys. Call it testosterone, call it whatever you want, but it is perceived as a negative in boys sports...it is seen as weak.

That's why I believe a rule should be passed. Because people won't do it voluntarily, it isn't manly. And it's just plain stupid.

Someone made snarky comments that all athletes should be in bubble wrap, that the bases should be made of marshmallows, etc. because there is an inherent risk in all athletics. I could not agree more. But if helmets for hitters is ok, helmets on football players are ok,, and just about every other improvement in safety, why not face masks for baseball pitchers?

There isn't a good reason against them. The most common argument that someone used was that it "wussyifies" our nation, that we have gotten too soft. I wonder if this person (I don't know) ever pitched, I wonder if this person has ever seen a baseball traveling over 150 MPH hit a person in the head and heard the sound it makes?

It's not pretty and I would be willing that the first time it happened to his son or grandson, his beliefs would probably be different...maybe not.

But the excuse that it makes our country soft to attempt to minimize injury when doing an athletic event is not valid.

If so, I guess seat belts have done the same thing. Call me soft, but I'm putting it on every time I drive even if the odds of me being in a wreck are slim.