Former Players

While driving to work this morning, I got to thinking about some of my former players. Some of them I talk to on a semi regular basis and some I rarely see or speak to. To be honest, the ones I do speak to usually approach me or I happen to see out at some event. Part of that is that I am still doing what I did when they played and part of it is they are living their lives, not doing what they did when they played.

I have always invited at the end of year speech in the locker room and even when I coached baseball, that any player that graduates is welcome anytime, any place in our program. If they want to just show up and watch practice, they can. If they want to just show up and come into our locker room before or after a game, they can. I don't get hung up too much anymore on that stuff and I feel that if a player was once a part of your program, they are always a part of your program.

Coaching basketball, I have found two types of former players. Some of it comes as a former player. I know that some of my old teammates are like this and I have experienced it from the other side also. There are those teammates of mine that are hugely supportive of our old coach, that he changed their lives, and they now understand why he was the way he was. There are those who are still bitter about not playing, about being yelled at, about not being used correctly. So I wonder how many of my former players are the same way.

We spend so much time together during their time here that I care so much about what they are doing after they leave. Some of they may resent me for whatever reason, but if they call, I will be there. If they send an invitation, I will be there. Of course, it would be contingent on if I could possibly get there, but I would never turn down helping a former player. To be honest, sometimes that help may not be what they want at the time, but I would help.

So you wonder, why doesn't such and such come around? Why doesn't such and such come to practice? Why do they feel like they are not a part of it even after they are gone? I think some of it has to do with our relationship, but I think also it has something to do with their comfort level. That it is not their team anymore, yet it is their program.

So for any former player, I told you this in the locker room your senior year and I am telling you now. You are welcome back any time as long as I am here coaching. Please contact me and tell me about your marriages and births and you starting to coach in little league. Contact me to tell me thanks and contact me to ask me why...I am secure enough in telling you why we did what we did and I am secure enough to admit my mistakes if I think I made them.

When the guys play their last game for me, I keep a picture of each senior class. It isn't them in their uniforms, it isn't them in the gym, it isn't them with a basketball, it is them together outside of the school in their graduation gowns and hats. To me that is what we are doing here. We are preparing them to move on, to live their lives; lives that I am interested in and what to know more about.

Summer 2011

We went fewer days last summer and we won fewer games last season. I am not sure there is a correlation there as Borden's girls played in zero games last season and won their sectional, but we feel that we need to do more this season. Because of snow dates, we will start practice before school is out on June 3 and will practice four times before we head to Orleans on June 7. That night we will play Orleans and West Washington. Then we take a day off and Coach Hill will take the varsity to Springs Valley for a tourney on June 10. I will be gone at that time, as I am heading to Iceland to work a camp for http://www.tindastoll.is/index.php?pid=2 . The head coach there is Borce Ilievski a friend that I had met before last summer but got to know better while in Serbia. The teams will practice three times while I am gone and Coach Hill will take the JV to Salem for a tourney. I should be back on June 20 and for the next two weeks we will play at Purdue, Wabash, and Olney Central J.C. That will give us about 20+ games for June. The moratorium is July 4th week and when that time is over we will have about 6 open gyms until school starts.

We Really Want to Win on Friday Night!!!

I was watching the NCAA tournament recently and former Wake Forest Head Coach Dino Gaudio was on and they were speaking about the Purdue men's job. For those of you that don't know, Coach Painter of Purdue sorta, kinda threatened to leave PU to go to the University of Missouri where he would receive more money. Now Coach Painter is well paid at Purdue and from what I understand this wasn't so much about money for him, but more money for his assistants.

But the comment that Coach Gaudio made I found interesting. "Everybody wants to win on Friday night, but do they want to win when it comes to helping in building better practice facilities, funding, donations, etc?". At first I thought of it only as a college comment, but it really isn't. It can be an example for high school sports also, obviously in different ways.

We all want to win on Friday night. But how many players have put the extra time in on their own? How many parents or community members of helped nudge them to work on their own? When gym time has been provided in the off season, how many players have taken advantage of it? How many parents/community members gotten the players to the gym when the doors were open or have they complained about all the extra time put in? How many kids have lifted weights on their own or taken advantage of gym time at school to do so?

How many players have put the time in during the summer when there has been practice or games? How often do the younger kids all the way down to the kindergarten age play basketball? How often do they practice?

This is not a condemnation or show of support for anyone or any community, but the statement has been made; "We really want to win on Friday night", but to win on Friday night takes much more than just showing up on Friday night to play. In some situations, it takes years of community and administration support. If those things don't occur (again not speaking of any specific situation, I feel supported by both here) how can we be held accountable for Friday night?

We may not be able to make chicken salad out of chicken...well, you know, but we can make it the best tasting...you know...that there has ever been. But is that enough? Is it enough for the community, administration, and even the coach?

As I Age (How Did I Get This Old?)

I went to one of those motivation seminars a few years back and I really enjoyed it. There were many speakers who gave great ideas about being motivated, every single day of their lives.

Rick Pitino spoke and I realize that he isn't always the best role model, but who is? We all fall short, don't we? Anyway, he said that as he grew older he realized how life works more and more. In our 20's it is all about working to attain any professional goal you desire, in your 30's it is about attaining that desire, in your 40's and 50's it is about helping others.

These kinds of comments hit home. Why? Because it is true.

In my 20's, once I realized what I wanted to do, I became motivated to get that one thing professionally I wanted. It took until my 30's to attain that goal. Then after growing in my faith and having children and a wonderful, faithful wife...I realized that it isn't about me. It isn't about what I want, it isn't about my happiness, but yet it is.

I love to go and socialize with many people usually basketball coaches. When I was younger I did so hoping that they could help me out in some way, what could they do for me. Now as I age, it is more what can I do for them. How can I help them? I have all that I need. I have all that the Lord sees fit for me to have. I have a beautiful, healthy family. I have a job that I think I am appreciated in not that it matters, but it does somewhat. I have many friends and acquantances that help through down times.

It isn't about me. In my 40's, it is about how can I set a positive example and help others become what they want to be. And I am smart enough to know that I fail at this often, but the goal is to strive to improve; two steps forward and one step back.

UCONN Wins! Or Did They?

Last night was the NCAA national championship game and Connecticut defeated Butler 53-41. It was a game so ugly that only a mother could love it, or maybe basketball coaches. I agree, it was ugly, very ugly, but was played in a way that was conducive to Butler having a chance. Because of that it was interesting to watch. Why? Why was it so ugly?

First, I believe that both teams came out to play hard. No easy anything for either team on offense. It seemed that very few shots were wide open or uncontested. The rotations were quick, hands were up and within reach to block or contest each shot. Inside, everything was physical and even though it looked like both teams were getting wide open looks, they weren't. I will watch it again and see, but it was a highly contested defensive game and UCONN was able to get a few more easier shots in the second half. I guess it comes down to your perspective on what "wide open" means. To me, it is catching the ball, checking the wind, and shooting. Not catching and releasing quickly because the defense is giving you nothing. Inside, wide open is not a 6'8 to 6'10 guy running across the lane attempting to block your shot when you are 6'4.

Second, I believe that if the officials would have called the game somewhat tighter it would have allowed for some of those contested shots to be a little more open. More FT's and more scoring, but they were letting it go on both sides and UCONN handled it better.

Third, Butler's lack of confidence started to show in the second half. It looked as if no one on the team wanted to shoot and every shot seemed like the last thing the shooter wanted to do. The more you miss it can become like a virus and spread to everyone on the team.

Fourth, in the first half, I truly enjoyed watching both teams compete and play hard. It was a championship defensive effort and really was for both teams throughout the game. 53-41...amazing. When you think about the UK vs. UCONN game being 54-53 defense was at a high level for UCONN in those two games. Defense wins championships.

It was interesting to follow so many people's comments during the game on facebook and twitter. Most of the people I follow on facebook are fans of the game, there are some coaches but most watch from a different perspective. I didn't say all, but most. And unequivocally they thought it was a terrible game (I don't think so, but I do agree with the word ugly). On twitter I follow mostly college and high school basketball coaches. Men and women who spend much of their time on basketball working to improve themselves and their teams and they were unequivocally enjoying the game.

Does that mean that I am right or that basketball coaches are right? No, last night was a game, a game played by young men in an ugly manner and everyone's opinion will be different. It doesn't make you unintelligent or even uninformed, but I found it interesting the different take by many of my "friends" in their varied backgrounds.

Now comes the awful situation that the NCAA has been put in or allowed themselves to be put in. UCONN is on probation, their coach will be suspended for 3 games next season and they are still under investigation. How bad will it be if the trophy is taken from UCONN? Maybe then, though, many people will get their wish and it will be recorded that the game never occurred.

Philosophies on Success or How to Get Rich Telling Others to Buy Your Book

I read a lot and many of the books I read are about how to be a successful person/coach/teacher, just fill in the blank. There are some things I have noticed.

First is often these books on success are written by successful people. Those people who have won awards or championships have written these books and people want to buy them. Who wouldn't? I mean they have won what I want so I will read their book and find out their "secret". What I find, and I mean just about every time, is that they claim that winning championships, awards or titles is not what it is all about! I believe them but how easy is it for someone who has won what the world thinks is important to claim that it isn't....important?

The reason anyone is listening to them and buying their book is because they have won what we want. They have made it to the top of the mountain we want to climb and then while standing up there are telling us the view isn't that good. That we need to do what we do for different reasons, again, I agree, but it is easy to make that assessment while standing on top of the mountain. I have found that while reading these books that people who have made it to the top and are claiming that is not what is life is about made their way to the top with a laser focus to get to the top.

Second, I have noticed that most of the things these people do to be successful are similar. They get up early, put more time in, have a positive outlook, self-motivation, etc. If these are the keys and if everyone is doing what the successful people told them to do to be successful why are we not all successful?

I will tell you why. Most people who read these books lack probably the most important thing that is needed to be a success. Self-motivation and mental toughness. To me, mental toughness is everything. Most people read these books and change for a short time but don't do what many of these books say must happen...the change must become permanent, a habit. So, we continue to buy these books on success making the successful more succesful all the while not following their advice.

However, I believe that success is not about standing on top of the mountain (easy for a guy who hasn't been there, huh?). It is about making a positive difference, and the relationships that you make along the way. It is about helping others and if championships and awards come with that, so be it.

Success is about making the big time where you are. It is about pulling people up and bettering themselves. It is about being a better person, father, husband, coach, teacher, son, uncle. It isn't about being "Father of the Year", the title. It is about being "Father of Madison and Brandon" and hopefully developing them into positive people who will pass it on.

It isn't about being "Coach of the Year", it is about being the best possible coach of the team you have right now. Making them better players and people who will make a difference in the world.

Finally, the most successful people you will find often aren't those who are standing on top of the mountain that everyone else is looking at. They are people who are standing on top of the mountain that is often not seen as a mountain to conquer. They are people who will live, fight, and die making a positive difference and many of us will never know their names and to them I want to say "thank you" for all you do without being recognized with worldly awards.