relationships

relationships
36 years coaching experience/Worked Camps/Clinics on 6 Continents

Monday, November 1, 2021

I Love My Maddie Girl

This past Saturday, our volleyball team played the #1 team in the state in the state tournament. Whoever won that game would play the next weekend for the state championship. Indy Brebeuf is a really good volleyball team and would probably beat us 9 out of 10 times if we played that many times.

So the whole week leading up to this and my speech to the girls was that they needed to play together and then they would have to fight...they would have to compete...they would have to not let up no matter what was happening. Make Brebeuf earn their victory if that should happen.

The whole team did this and we lost in 5 sets. Brebeuf was shocked that we were in a fifth set, as we were down 0-2, then won the third and fourth sets.

When the match was over, our girls were upset and that is how it's supposed to be.I told them at the end I wanted to see tears, tears of victory or that they had fought so hard it hurt...a lot.

As Maddie walked out of the locker room, I knew she would be hurting and she was.


She was distraught, crying, and hurting and I hugged her.

One of our friends snapped the above picture and I think it encapsulates what we do as parents.

Let them out on their own to live and learn, and we are to always be here to celebrate or console, whichever it requires.

I love her and I am so proud of the woman she has become.

Cornerstone Hoops Board of Director Kristen Mattox Cox Inducted into Indiana Basketball Hall of Fame


 NEW CASTLE - The 2020 women's induction class of the Indiana Basketball Hall of Fame in New Castle has been announced. This year's honorees include a former Indiana Miss Basketball, a former WNBA Detroit Shock player and a three-year starter and tri-captain at the University of Indianapolis, who fought through both knees being reconstructed and six total surgeries.

The Class of 2020 will be recognized during a ceremony April 25 in Indianapolis.

Inductees include:

  • Tina (Reece) Bennett, Austin, Class of 1985
  • Amy Brauman, Brownsburg, Class of 1991
  • Kristin (Mattox) Cox, Charlestown Class of 1992
  • Debbie (Benziger) Dudukovich, Kokomo, Class of 1994
  • Tiffany Gooden, Fort Wayne Snider, Class of 1994
  • Angela Hamblin-Blakely, Class of Gary Lew Wallace, Class of 1994
  • Sandy Herre, Benton Central, Class of 1988
  • Danielle McCulley, Gary West, Class of 1993
  • Erika (McCoy) Robinson, Seymour, Class of 1986
  • Stacie Shepherd, Richmond, Class of 1990
  • Amy (Walker) Sundt, Bedford North Lawrence, Class of 1991  

Monday, September 20, 2021

We All Need to Grow Up, I Mean Learn

Man, social media brings us together in ways that humankind would have not thought about just a few short years ago. Not only can you talk to people in the same house as you, but family you don't see often, old classmates, friends from around the world and, well, anyone. There is so much good that can come from this contact and interaction, but there is also bad.

I have personally witness at least two situations where an event occurs and before there is but just the smallest and most slanted amount of information is found, it gets revealed and all that read it assume it as truth. And then everyone with a preconceived thought system dog piles onto that little sliver of information. And before you know it, not only is this one thing bad, but suddenly a litany of "bad" things come up using this one situation as a reason for every ill thought you have ever had for the thing or person involved. Sure, I have seen it nationally with presidents and other national leaders, but they aren't "real" people, but it happens to them also.

It's sickening. Some of these situations turn on an instant that is bad, real bad. But before all information is given that little microcosm is shared and it becomes a much bigger issue than what is the bad issue. So I am calling myself out. Never assume that what you read is the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth. Maybe, just maybe there is more to the story and maybe when that comes out and I have jumped to an extreme conclusion, I should apologize or feel bad.

But we don't.

We throw gas on the fire.

And if I find out the truth isn't what I thought it was, then I just don't post anymore, but what I have done is created a forest fire that leaves scars even after I slightly back away from my mess. 

And it only allows for that scarred situation to return again for the next fire because not all of the truth ever gets spread in a way that mistruth does and that will justify my preconceived wrong opinion, yet again as I point and continue the anger, dislike, and half-truths of life.

Tuesday, August 3, 2021

Ukraine...2021

I was a little lost, I am not going to lie to you. I love to travel, I love basketball and I love sharing my faith and Covid had taken some of that away, internationally anyway. But in the spring of 2021, I could see that Covid was starting to dwindle and it looked like I could maybe go somewhere during the summer. But I did not know where or how I would do it.

Then God stepped in.

One day, I received an email from Todd James, a basketball coach that had been involved with ministry for many years and was now in the guiding part of his career. Guiding coaches to each other.

I had published this book on Amazon and he had come across it and we emailed back and forth and he had contacts. He put me in touch with The Admirals Academy in Vyshneve, Ukraine and God was glorified.

I was given the email of Eugen Pogorelov and I was typing up an email to send him, he emailed me. I responded immediately, shocking him, and just like that a relationship had started because of Coach James, and plans were put into effect.

After a couple of Google meetings with Coach Eugene and his counterpart Leonid Stefanyshyn, the planning of the trip was on. Because Covid-19 was still a thing, and even though I had been vaccinated with the Pfizer shot, I had to show a negative Covid test three days before flying. We had been a part of this pandemic for over a year and I had not felt bad, had not been tested by anyone, but this test was to be administered by me. It was not fun. But it came back negative and I was ready to fly out. I took off from Louisville, Kentucky, landed in Atlanta, then Amsterdam, and finally in Kiev.

There I met the coaches and we got something to eat and I went to sleep ready to begin  the next day. Over the course of the next six days, we did basketball seven hours a day with groups aging from probably 7 or 8 to 14-15. The kids were great, the coaches were, too and at the end of each day of practice, I would give a values lesson (to younger kids) or teach part of The Gospel to the older kids. The players were very good, the level of play was high, and they were attentive most days.

My travels around Kiev sort of shocked me though. I was surprised by the amount of western style clothing and cars there were. It was explained to me that it was cheaper to buy a wrecked car from the US and have it sent to Kiev and worked on than to buy a car in Ukraine. As for the clothing...Amazon. I was told by a parent that they see something they like and they can have it bought and sent via Amazon. The restaurants were good. Of course, all of the fast food restaurants are in the capital, but even some of the nicer restaurants had food that tasted similar to ours.

After saying my goodbyes to the players which is harder than you would think, we had one day left. I had told Eugene I wanted to visit Chernobyl which was not far away. His response “Really?” He had never been. And off we went. 

I can only explain how surreal it was, but you do not understand unless you were there. I remember when the nuclear reactor in Chernobyl exploded, I was probably 16 at the time in the 1980’s. It was a huge global issue that the former Soviet Union tried to hide, but it was so big they could not. They had to evacuate 160 villages along with the larger towns of Chernobyl and Prypiat. Walking around the larger towns was like walking on a movie set with the abandoned home and buildings. And standing where the explosion occurred so many years before was a weighty experience I will never forget.

The next day, I said my goodbyes and boarded the plane in Kiev for the long trip home. Oh, from Atlanta to Louisville, I sat next to Derek Willis. He’s from the Louisville area, played at The University of Kentucky and is playing professionally in Europe. It was a great hour long flight talking to him about basketball and life.

When I got home and thought about my time in Ukraine, I do not know if it is from my travels, or my not being able to travel over the last year, but this experience was the most “normal” travel I have had. Maybe it’s because of a lot of things, but I think God is moving me, and it didn’t hurt that Leonid and Eugene were so good and helpful.











Monday, May 10, 2021

Anyone Else?

(Above picture on the left is how I look, the one on the right is how I feel)

My mind is always at work...and usually not for all the right reasons.

So here we go.

I get up in the morning, I wonder if my wife is ok, how does she feel?

I miss my kids, so I go in and Maddie is fine this morning, thank God, she's a teenage girl and at any given moment things can go south.

If she's not doing well, then I am worried about her and try to talk to her.

Brandon's up, he's not a morning person so I try to get a hug, but usually get pushed away "leave me alone." If only he'd go to sleep sooner at night, but I am a jerk then, too. At least then I can get a hug.

Then I am at school.

Am I doing what I am supposed to do?

How can I fit in and not worry about it without being a jerk or should I just stay in my room today and stay to myself?

I need to show the students that I care because I do, but I am afraid of being too close because it hurts when they hurt.

Am I doing the right thing?

Quit thinking about the past, wishing you were doing something different now, and preparing so much for the future, I tell myself.

What was that text about? Was it sincere or was there something else behind it?

Why am I so insecure?

Why do I put up walls?

Why do I feel it's so much effort to be open?

Why does it feel that when I take steps forward, the world just sucks me back in to being sheltered and alone?

Why can't my mind rest?

During the day, I can think of something that happened years ago and start to get upset that I felt I got wronged...or it could have just happened 5 seconds ago.

Why do I assume so much of what others are thinking or what they mean?

I feel like I can get a read on a crowd, but I have been wrong before, or have I? Was I right and that person or persons are not telling the truth now?

Why don't I get invited to the most simple things with "friends"?

Maybe it's because of what I have written above.

Whew...yes, it's rough living between my two ears.

Some days or weeks are worse than others, but it can be exhausting.

And I just want to rest, to close my eyes, and get away from this moment...right now.

Wednesday, April 7, 2021

A Good Time Was Had by SC

 

2 Time State Champion

Outside our Hotel in Indy.

Marian University Coach Scotty Heady speaking to the team.

Top 3 scorers in SC history with legendary state keeper George Gerth. (Kooper Jacobi #2, Steve Green #3, and Trey Kaufman-Renn #1)

All four legs of the state tourney in 2021.

SC, IU, Indiana Pacers legend Steve Green giving shooting tips to my son in 2019 and 2021.

State Champions 2021

Steve Green speaking to the team.

The floor at Banker's Life.